Category: ballin’

Back from the Dead


Get ready for some embarrassing amateur poetry, mean postcards to conservative legislators, and pessimistic conjecture about the future of the planet and the human species because after two years and eleven months I’m reviving the blog machine!

Why did the blog die? I don’t know really. One possible explanation is that the recurring ‘ask out a female celebrity’ thing got old and the more I learned about the nightmarish, hate filled swamp the internet has become for women the less fun or even appropriate those entries became. Even if they were intended to mock the stereotypes of online dating (wanna get some coffee!?), the primacy of celebrity in American culture, and as a framing device for discussions about social and political topics it still just became……icky, and even more so retrospectively when considering things like the gamergate horrorshow and what happened to Leslie Jones. So no more of those.

Why else? Creative slump, gradual and sadly inevitable professionalization (meaning more work, more attention to work, more time spent thinking about work when I’m not at work, more work trying to become better at work – additional training, etc.), complete and utter dissatisfaction with my ability to write, a hideous black cloud of despair cast by climate news and the descent of my country into proud and outright oligarchy, or maybe just the dissipation of anything resembling an attention span due to the omnipresence of various social media feeds. I don’t really know, it was probably a combination of all these things and more.

Why revive it? Again, no real idea but I have a guess: the deep and alarming sense of intellectual/mental emptiness that comes from hate-scrolling endlessly through facebook and descending into barely suppressible rage at the state of the world and the country. This is not a healthy thing! What is also not a healthy thing is hitting refresh endlessly on facebook and twitter hoping for…………..I don’t know what exactly, that good news will happen? It demands absolutely nothing of me in terms of effort or consideration or thought to browse headlines and if I’m gonna fry my retinas and ruin my sleep/wake cycles with LED light then I might as well bang away on the keyboard about something for a while, which is at the very least an extended effort to produce a piece of writing, however terrible it may be.

Anyway, here we go again with the nihilism and bug pictures and pretty flowers and postcards to retrograde congress-demons, and the terrible poetry, and the swears, and hopefully the occasional thoughtful piece of writing that I’m not ashamed of.